Won't you try some of my pasta sambar?

So I was trying to think why I had christened my blog space so, especially considering I don't know how to cook Indian food. I'm guessing it had something to do with me being a "Confused Desi".

You've eaten curry and you almost know what goes into it..there must be some red chilly powder, some turmeric powder and some of those other colored powders. I’ve seen my mom whip it up in the kitchen. Despite many failed attempts, I have never been able to create Curry-Magic in my kitchen. However, I can make the best lasagna, or so I thought, till one of my Italian friends called it a disgrace to her culture. (So it didn’t really have the appearance of perfect lasagna, but it sure tasted like it.)


It's not really about the powders, making pasta or curry. It's that feeling of being a misfit in both societies. If you've lived anywhere outside India for a while, you start to think, "Oh yah since I talk the talk and walk the walk, I must a white person trapped inside this brown skin." Then why am I not allowed to go to raves or invite guy friends over or major in arts?

DOH! ofcourse ..it's because "We're not like them" (It's the anthem of Indian-Parents-Abroad-Society).

So then you think, well I must fit perfectly in India, because that's where I'm from. Gravely mistaken. You can't understand why people commit mass suicides because their favorite actor died, why wives consider it a privilege to slave over their husbands, why you can get somewhere faster walking than if you drove there, why bribes are considered the natural way of life and why love-marriages are considered a disgrace to the family. That was your inability to comprehend India. Worse is how they perceive you. If you speak English you are showing off, you are not one bit graceful in a sari, if you have guy friends or have any epidermis showing besides on your face, you are the devil ! Heavens forbid you decide to choose your own life partner. If you are daring enough to do any of the former mentioned, be ready to be ostracized by your immediate community.

It is so challenging to balance two cultures and painful not to be accepted in either.

I'd like to refer to my previous post, about fitting into the mass societal puzzle. You are exposed to very broad outlooks and then trained to fit into a very narrow mold. Obviously when you don't fit, you are a misfit for all casts. If you think I’m crazy and such a species of puzzled souls do not walk the face of the earth, check out : http://www.answers.com/American%20Born%20Confused%20Desi
In the meantime, I will finish my lasagna sambar with a spoon while listening to “Mera Joota Hai Japani, Yeh Patloon Englishtani ,
Sar Pe Laal Topi Roosi , Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani
Mera Joota..”